If you were only able to use touch, would they be able to understand how you felt about them? Take advantage of the easiest time to let your partner know you love them and fill your sex sessions with little loving caresses and touches that make them feel connected to you. Nothing terrifies me more than being so close to someone and then watching them become a stranger again. While he was here at home we probably had sex at […].
Why it was almost the real thing… […]. Every couple should read about the 5 languages of love and make sure they are showing their partner that they are appreciated in a way they understand. Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday. You may unsubscribe at any time. By subscribing, you agree to the terms of our Privacy Statement.
5 love languages physical touch for dating couple
More From Thought Catalog. Love Is All You Need. What type of affection they respond to best, aka their love language. Another approach is to do a five-week experiment. The first week, you focus on one of the five love languages and seek to speak it every day and observe the response of your spouse.
On Saturday and Sunday, you relax. The second week—Monday through Friday—you focus on another of the love languages and continue with a different language each of the five weeks. It will be obvious that this is their primary love language. I think that our primary love language tends to stay with us for a lifetime. It is like many other personality traits that develop early and remain consistent. For example, a highly organized person was likely organized as a child. A person who is more laid-back and relaxed likely had that trait as a child. This is true of numerous personality traits.
However, there are certain situations in life that make the other love languages extremely attractive. For example, your primary love language may be Words of Affirmation , but if you are the mother of three preschool children, then Acts of Service by your husband may become extremely attractive to you.
However, if Words of Affirmation cease, you will quickly know that this continues to be your primary love language. If you experience the death of a parent or a close friend, even if Physical Touch is not your primary love language, an extended hug by your spouse may be the most meaningful thing for you at the moment.
There is something about being held in the midst of our grief that communicates that we are loved.
While Physical Touch is not your primary love language, it is extremely meaningful on such occasions. I like to visualize that inside every child there is an emotional love tank. If the child feels loved by the parents, the child grows up normally. It is extremely important that parents learn how to love children effectively. One of the points we make in the book is that children need to learn how to receive and give love in all five languages. This produces an emotionally healthy adult.
It really helped us in raising our children. However, now our son has become a teenager. Whatever you have been doing in the past, the teenager considers to be childish and will want nothing to do with it. You must now speak Physical Touch in more adult dialects such as an elbow to the side, a fist to the shoulder, a pat on the back, or playfully wrestle the teen to the floor.
How To Show Your Partner They're Loved, Based On Their Love Language | HuffPost Life
These touches will communicate your love to a teenager. As teens get older, they become more capable. Thus they need to have more responsibilities. When these responsibilities are tied with increased freedom, the teenager is motivated to become a responsible young person. For example, if you are going to allow the teen to drive a car, this freedom should be accompanied by a responsibility such as being responsible to keep the car clean and filled with gas. If they fail to meet this responsibility, there should be specific consequences already in place, such as losing the privilege of driving for two days.
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If the parent consistently applies the consequences, the teenager will have an extremely clean car and will learn that freedom and responsibility are opposite sides of the same coin. Encouraging personal responsibility is another important part of being a loving parent. It is extremely difficult for me to initiate physical touch. The good news is that all of the five love languages can be learned. It is true that most of us grew up speaking only one or two of these love languages. These will come naturally for us and will be relatively easy. The others must be learned.
As in all learning situations, small steps make for big gains. These small touches will begin to break down the barrier. Each time you touch, the next touch will be easier. You can become proficient in speaking the language of Physical Touch. The same is true with the other languages. Stand in front of a mirror and read the list until you become comfortable hearing yourself say those words. Then choose one of the statements, walk in the room, and say it to your spouse. Each time you affirm them, it will become easier.
Not only is your spouse feeling good about your changed behavior, but you are also feeling good about yourself because you know that you are effectively expressing love to your spouse. I have never done the research to discover if the love languages are gender-slanted.
I prefer to deal with the love languages as being gender-neutral. I do know that any one of these love languages can be the primary love language of a man or the primary love language of a woman. The important thing in marriage is that you discover the primary and secondary love languages of your spouse and you speak these regularly. If you do this, you will create a healthy emotional climate for marital growth.
In the book, I share some of my encounters with couples through the years that brought me to realize that what makes one person feel loved does not necessarily make another person feel loved. For a number of years, I have been helping couples in the counseling office discover what their spouse desired in order to feel loved.
Eventually, I began to see a pattern in their responses. I later called them the five love languages. I then started sharing these languages in workshops and study groups. Therefore, I decided to write a book in which I would share the concept, hoping to influence thousands of couples whom I would never have an opportunity to meet in person. Now that the book has sold over 12 million copies in English and has been translated into over 50 languages around the world, my efforts have been more than rewarded.
I discovered it in the Anglo setting. Then came the French edition, the German, the Dutch, etc. In almost every culture, the book has become the bestseller of the publisher. This leads me to believe that these five fundamental ways of expressing love are universal. However, the dialects in which these languages are spoken will differ from culture to culture.
For example, the kind of touches that are appropriate in one culture may not be appropriate in another culture. The Acts of Service that are spoken in one culture may not be spoken in another culture. But when these cultural adaptations are made, the concept of the five love languages will have a profound impact upon the couples in that culture. I believe that our deepest emotional need is the need to feel loved. If we are married, the person we would most like to love us is our spouse.
If we feel loved by our spouse, the whole world is bright and life is wonderful.
Physical touch love language ideas.
On the other hand, if we feel rejected or ignored, the world begins to look dark. Most couples get married when they still have the euphoric feelings of being in love. When the euphoric feelings evaporate some time after the wedding and their differences begin to emerge, they often find themselves in conflict. With no positive plan for resolving conflicts, they often find themselves speaking harshly to each other.
Harsh words create feelings of hurt, disappointment, and anger. Not only do they feel unloved, but they also begin to resent each other. When couples read The 5 Love Languages , they discover why they lost the romantic feelings of courtship and how emotional love can be rekindled in their relationship. With a full love tank, they can now process their conflicts in a much more positive manner and find solutions that are workable.
The rebirth of emotional love creates a positive emotional climate between the two of them and they learn to work together as a team—encouraging, supporting, and helping each other reach meaningful goals.
Once this happens, they want to share the message of the five love languages with all of their friends. Every year since its first publication, the book has sold more than it did the year before. How long am I supposed to continue speaking his love language when there is no response? If they need to bring a present to a party or event, help by picking it out or purchasing it for them.
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Opinion HuffPost Personal Videos. Get their car washed Pick up their dry cleaning Fill up their gas tank Do their laundry Pack their lunch If they need to bring a present to a party or event, help by picking it out or purchasing it for them.