Thank you very much for your comment. I really am okay with staying in that doesn't bother me much. I just am concerned that every interaction results in very little conversation unless he has had a small amount to drink but always ends in sex. Which Dont get me wrong I Dont mind but it leaves me to wonder how he really feels as he isn't much on flowery words or sharing emotions. And the fact I always reach out for plans despite me telling him is feel better about being invited.
Was just curious if these behaviors were typical I guess. As an I introvert I feel comfortable saying that this is more than just Introversion. If you have made it clear to him that you want him to put the thought into inviting you to do things and have said that you want to hear words of affirmation and he's not listening to you then that's what it is. I'll admit that i don't have any kids so I don't know how much that throws things into disarray, but if you have talked about what you want and he's not trying to do that then that's on him, not just his personality.
I'm chatty with my husband, close friends, and close family. Anyone with whom I'm beyond small talk. Getting to know someone and deepen the relationship through conversation is very rewarding for many introverts. It's the kind of social interaction we're best at. Parties, concerts, networking events?
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But getting to know certain people in a more intimate way is typically what we like. There may well be something else at play. Whether that's anxiety, distractions from his own life, or lack of interest, none of us can tell you for sure. Sounds like this could be a difficult phase for him with demands from the kids, etc. I recently discovered Gnaulati and while this article does not specifically address your situation , you may find it has a lot of insight. This part clicked with me and you might appreciate it too:.
Thirty seconds, a minute, or even more time may pass before an answer is supplied. In the meantime, the listener might wonder if the boy is deaf or completely self-absorbed. Thanks its just difficult to read him because he can be so hot and cold. Sometimes when we are together he is very affectionate and hands on and many other times I am always the initiator.
Actually I have to initiate everything talking, affection, plans etc. When I've addressed it with him again he says I'm always welcome and wanted. However you would think being as I've expressed my need for him to initiate at some point he would do so. I guess I'm partly venting as well.
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I am trying so hard to learn not to be offended by silences, the need for space, the lack of flowery words and to try and read his actions. He is just so all over the place it makes it difficult. In the beginning we texted a lot and that worked well and satisfied my need for interaction. Lately the texts are fewer and not consistent. Meaning he always texted me before work to have a good night and always texted in the morning. I normally would read all these signs and think he's not interested any more and I hate asking.
But of course I did and he told me I was overthinking everything and needed to stop. Needed someone to listen I guess. I am a big introvert, but like other people said this is more than just introvert.
Sound to me like he is not interested in the relationship. Even we introverts have interest in things. He might be an introvert but it also sounds like he feels entitled to treat other people poorly. If you are tap dancing all around him trying to maintain this relationship single-handedly, you will keep doing this routine forever with this guy.
Do you or your children really deserve to have your focus aimed this hard at someone who simply isn't reciprocating?
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If he was invested in this relationship the way you are you would know it already. It sounds to me like you are bending yourself into pretzels for someone who is barely considering you at all. Please don't make it so easy for a jerk to take advantage of you.
I shared an apartment with one of the biggest extroverts I have ever known, while I am an extreme introvert, but somehow it worked out perfectly! Your email address will not be published. Sign me up for the newsletter! Username or Email Address. Don't have an account? Psychology Articles Quizzes Shop.
Comparing Extrovert and Introvert Dating Styles | LoveToKnow
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