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  • Can I be Sued if I Date a Married Man or Woman? | Charlotte Family Law Lawyers?

If the spouse is successful in her actions against you, you are the one that has to pay up, not the husband. Since courts in North Carolina now recognize same-sex marriages, it is likely that courts will eventually recognize same-sex criminal conversation and alienation of affections actions, although in some actions the traditional definitions of actionable sexual contact may present difficulties for claimants.


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In North Carolina, criminal conversation and alienation of affections actions—nicknamed heart-balm claims—are often filed along with or during litigation of a pending divorce case. One scenario that may commonly arise, for instance, sees a husband and wife having difficulty agreeing on how much monthly support payable to the wife is appropriate. They also disagree on how to divide their assets. Then the wife finds out her husband has a girlfriend. In fact, she learns through his Facebook account, he has had the girlfriend for some time.

She tells her lawyer, and her lawyer files criminal conversation and alienation of affections actions against the girlfriend and serves them upon her. Now the husband has a legal mess with his wife and a legal mess with his girlfriend, and the wife knows it. This is called leverage.

She has every legal right to do so, assuming the facts as she presents them are true or that it is reasonable, based on what she has seen and heard, to believe they are true. Criminal conversation and alienation of affections actions are unpopular with many lawyers and legislators, and someday the actions may be abolished in North Carolina. As long as these causes of action remain viable, however, separated spouses and those involved in relationships with separated spouses must tread carefully.

Call toll free at or Contact Us Here. We serve clients throughout North Carolina including those in the following localities: You cannot reason with the unreasonable;. Schedule your consultation today. Family Law and Divorce. Heart-balm actions can be used as leverage in divorce cases.

Dating a Married Man ? Read this To Know the Complications

While he is more than willing to be your lover and to bring you gifts, he is not about to have you meet his friends and risk having his family find out about you. No matter how nice a guy he is, you are a temporary diversion for him. This is not an easy statement to comprehend.


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Unfortunately it is true. The beginning of an affair is romantic and naughty at the same time. Planning to be together becomes a fascinating game and is thrilling to say the least. Stealing hours from work or home to have sex is exciting, and you may mistake his libido-driven passion for undying love. The game soon becomes a chore for him, and romantic interludes are just one more thing he "has to do. He will not leave his wife. Less than 5 percent of men leave their wives for the woman with whom they are having an affair. Whether it is because of all the legal and financial problems attached to divorce, religious beliefs or the fact that they have become comfortable with their marriage the way it is -- or even because they still have a certain affection for their wives, men rarely end up with the other woman.

Even Katharine Hepburn knew, and accepted, this fact during her long affair with Spencer Tracy.

Can I be Sued if I Date a Married Man or Woman?

And don't ever kid yourself on this important point: He is still having sex with his wife, no matter what you may want to believe. Legally, financially and emotionally, you have no claim. You may realize that you have no claim legally or financially, but you would think there'd be an emotional attachment or bond between you and your lover.

In fact there usually isn't after the affair is over. Even though he has a deep feeling of love for you, he is able to process it in an unemotional way.

He's not a bad guy, he may be a wonderfully kind person, but he is also a practical one. He knows that holding on to emotions that can only cause problems for his family is something he cannot and will not do.

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When it's over, he will move on. To safeguard yourself from too much emotional pain, you need to understand that he can only be a small part of your life and will never be more than that no matter how many promises are made. You need to have a life that works and that is full enough to withstand the pain of the eventual breakup. He has one and you need one, too. A solid circle of friends and a social life separate from your hidden life with him is a necessity. Let your friends know that you still want to go out with them regularly. Don't always be so ready to cancel plans you have made with others to accommodate him.

Casual dating with male friends helps, too.