Understanding the Status Quo

Is your current relationship purely sexual, would you prefer to engage in dates and other social engagements with your partner, or would you want take comfort in forging a commitment while refraining from dating or engaging in sexual activity with others? If you and your partner already spend time with one another in addition to your sexual meetups, then you may only need to discuss the idea of formally dating. On the other hand, if your relationship is purely sexual, you may need to talk to your partner about including date-like liaisons into your relationship if you wish it to progress into something more than sex.

The most effective form of communication occurs when your message is clear and directed toward the recipient. With regards to advancing your relationship, you should be up front and direct with your sexual partner and let him know that you would like to change the nature of your relationship. This may require that you identify any confounding rules of your current relationship, including any previously agreed-upon ideals that you would not pursue a dating relationship.

Turning a Hook Up into a Relationship

While speaking directly to your partner may leave you open for rejection, being up front and honest will provide you with the means to make an informed decision about how to proceed with him in the future. Despite the popular assumption that sexual hook ups cannot evolve into meaningful relationships, a study conducted by Anthony Paik at the University of Ohio suggested that although those engaging in casual sex relationships tend to report having less relationship satisfaction, the screening process in selecting sexual partners can weed out undesirable traits that would make someone un-datable.

Forming a meaningful relationship with your sexual partner requires that you both be willing to put forth the effort and energy into the relationship that you normally expect would in any other dating context.


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This includes mutual respect, shared interests and generally enjoying spending time with one another, both in and out of the bedroom. There is always the possibility that your partner may not want to pursue a formal dating relationship with you. Whether he does not want to be tied down, is interested in dating someone else or is happy with the current status quo of your relationship, his failure to move forward with the relationship may also impact your current sexual relationship.

If he decides not to pursue a relationship with you, you should ask yourself if it is worth your time and emotional well-being to remain sexually active with him, or if it is time for you to move on. Anthony Oster is a licensed professional counselor who earned his Master of Science in counseling psychology at the University of Southern Mississippi. He has served as a writer and lead video editor for a small, South Louisiana-based video production company since Oster is the co-owner of a professional photography business and advises the owner on hardware and software acquisitions for the company.

How to Deny a Marriage Proposal. You will notice how she acts, feels, and reacts to this topic so you adjust to her.

Ask the things that reveal her character to you. That is how you will deepen the relationship you two have, move it from only physical to emotional and convey to her that you are interested in her. And by interested, I mean not just in her physique, but also her brains, emotions, and life. Keep on calibrating your approach to the questions and make it a conversation, not an interrogation.

Hookup turned dating checklist

We are starting the sail at Can you make it? You have a boat?

How to Turn A One Night Stand Into A Relationship! (7 Easy Tips)

Business was going good so I got myself one last year. And the conversation could continue in so many different ways, all beneficial for you if you used the second approach. Instead of telling her how cool, brave, rich, smart, reliable you are, simply show her that through your lifestyle. Simply live your life as you live it per usual and simply show her that. You can simply take her to your favorite coffee shop where the staff treats you like family, or invite her over for a movie where she can see the pictures from your travels on your apartment walls. When she sends you a message or demands that you talk to her, invest time in her and in general be available to her, you need to chill out a bit and not respond immediately.

Because you have just shown her your cool life and now, she is hooked on you and she wants to get to you know you more. If you take a ball of string and tease the cat with it, holding it so close but yet out of the reach, she will constantly jump around to take it, thus keeping itself interested in it. If the cat gets the ball, she will play with it for a while but then lose interest. So by making yourself there, but a bit out of reach, she will simply want you more. This basically means that she should know that you have other girls in your life and that other girls want your time.

You can use social media effectively for this by showing off with other girls via Facebook, Instagram or Snapchat. Brand of any company is a perceived value and you as a guy can have the same thing.

7 Ways to Turn Your Hookup Into a Boyfriend

We want more of the things we perceive valuable and if other people want it to, then the perceived value of the item grows. So the more women want you, the more value you will appear to have.

Ok, you are a busy guy with an amazing lifestyle and a lot of girls around you. If you make her feel this important in your life by making her your world for the next one or four hour, you will get yourself a great girlfriend. Wow, what a boring movie… I mean person. Leave many places mysterious but you can drop some small hints here and there.

Let her want to know you more and explore everything you are instead of you simply telling her everything. And she will be on a quest to discover who you are. Remember the cat string theory here — give her just enough to keep her hooked but not everything to grow bored. I did this thing with an audience of people when I started telling them about my internship to Russia. So the authorities deported me back to Turkey.

But then, all hell broke loose and the government in Turkey locked me up in the jail at the airport. But what followed in the jail was the most difficult day in my life. This is also something borrowed from the evolutionary biology where tribes would fight together if there was a bigger threat endangering all of them.

During this time of crisis, you become so cohesive against something out there that you act like a single individual.

Turning a Hook Up into a Relationship | Our Everyday Life

And by creating this kind of scenario, you two get this internal cohesion against something out there. Framing the conversation this way happens naturally over a longer period of time, but if you want it to happen fast, then you should use polarization. We have covered a lot here, from the initial dilemma of you actually wanting to date the girl or not. We had a small checklist there with 4 questions you should have answered for yourself.

The 4 questions were related to: The Honeymoon phase 2. Relationship fitting your lifestyle right now and, 4. The dual approval of heart and mind. Only when you have answered these questions and decided that you want to date a hookup, is when we went into pieces of advice on turning a hookup girl into someone you date. Making a real connection 2.

Making it about more than just booty calls 3. Talking about relationships in general 4. Asking about her life 5. Showing her your cool life 6. Making her miss you 7. Using passive attraction 8. Creating mystery around you and Why emotional intelligence will get you the girl.