The real rules about old and young you can date

JamesFell Send a private message.

Do you think it's right for a 47 year old man dating a 22 year old girl ?

I am a 47 year old man. I'm also married, but for the sake of answering this question I'll pretend to be single. You used the word "dating. So, were I to find myself single and a 22 year old woman wanted to "date" me, and especially if she was hot, I bet I'd have a hard time saying no to that.

Undressed: What’s the Deal With the Age Gap in Relationships?

I'd also not be too excited to tell others, for fear of being judged creepy. But I cannot see that it would last, or really be based on anything other than sex. I'd probably start to feel a little creepy myself. Personally, I have a hard time finding women under 30 attractive to me because they look too much like girls from my older perspective now. Most importantly, relationships are based on conversations and mutual interests and connections. I'm not saying it's impossible for a 47 year old and a 22 year old to have a lot in common, but it does seem pretty unlikely.

I do meet young women fairly regularly as I teach and mentor them about writing and they don't seem that much different than my daughter.

Undressed: What’s the Deal With the Age Gap in Relationships?

In other words, the type of things you're interested in at 22 are a lot different than when you're At 31 my mom met my step dad, who is 10 years older. They've been deliriously happy together for over 40 years now. I also agree it has to be just for sex. I feel 22 yr old still have a lot to experience in life and yes a 47yr old man has great leaverage over her. She'e either a gold digger or has zero self-esteem. Not trying to be offensive, but there's no other reason for her to date an old man that she has nothing in common with - similarity in experiences based on age is essential, and the key to success in dating new people.

Emmawolf Send a private message. I'm a 22 year old sleeping with a 43 year old and it's awesome. Males my age grew up in the 'hardcore' porn era so I often find my head hanging off the back of the bed, at least with someone experienced it's quality not novelty. Ohhh and added bonus The dirty talk about age is super hot if you just chill out ;. Edited on October 5, at I won't choose to date someone closer in age to my father than to me, but if they're both old enough to make their own decisions, who am I to say they shouldn't?

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If it were "right" it wouldn't be nearly as much fun. Who am I kidding, yes it would. Sure he's going to like to bang you but not keep you long term as in a few years he will be impotent whereas you will still be able to get wet naturally, Won't last and chances are he won't want you long term. Kingslayer Send a private message. Sterling Send a private message.

Fully informed and consensual adults of legal age can do whatever the heck they want. While its not as common, I dont see anything wrong with it either. It's just not natural. Curious as to what exactly is "natural"? Anyone who is NOT old enough to be your parent. That would be your opinion or is that a fact? I ask becasue "natural" is one of those words peole like to use to condemn you into conformity. They say "That's not natural" when they really mean "I don't like that. Only humans believe mother nature is a kind soul.

What's "natural" in nature is condemned in the civilized world.

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When you think about it, it's not unnatural for any man to want a 22 year old woman. Although I could have hit the streets of New York and surveyed people in-person Buunk style, I decided to mTurk my survey. I try to avoid as much social interaction in my daily life as possible. This can vary from transcribing a movie, to identifying an item on a receipt, to taking a survey about hypothetical romantic relationships.

Within a few days I got responses: As John and Lauren got older, however, the creepiness rule differed from how people actually responded.

Yet according to the survey, 37 was well outside the age range of what is socially acceptable. The results also showed that the creepiness rule is too restrictive about how old you can date when you are young, but becomes too lenient as you get older. Yet, people surveyed were fine with John and Lauren seeing someone in their early 30's.


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When John and Lauren are 60, the creepiness rule allows them to date anyone older than themselves the official cap is However, society places more restrictive age limits of 71 and 75 respectively. Overall, the creepiness rule does not accurately represent what people find socially acceptable; people are more judgmental than what the creepiness rule implies. If the creepiness rule is wrong, then I needed a new rule to guide my non-existent love life.

About Grow your Grades

As I reviewed the data, I realized that one rule was not enough. When it comes to dating older, women have the advantage. Um, I thought, petting my two-years-younger boyfriend. I almost forgot about the Princeton Mom until last month, when international headlines went nuts over the new French president elect and his wife. Brigitte Trogneux met Emmanuel Macron when he was 15 and she was his year-old drama teacher, already married with three kids. It appears this age gap is largely driven by dudes.

The older men get, the younger the women they message relative to their own age. Women, on the other hand, message and respond most often to men about their own age.

Once they reach 35, women actually respond more often to younger guys. But because men are usually the conversation starters, the older-man-younger-woman paradigm prevails. Alright, so maybe OkCupid en masse follows dating age conventions, but what about those women who want to flip the norm on its head? How difficult is it for them to date a younger man?

What I found was kind of surprising. When men message women, women tend to respond most often to men around their own ages.