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Scarcity Vs. Unlimited Choices

A few minutes here and there add up. Find an hour or two, or even the occasional lunchbreak twenty minutes? You might have to start with a smaller increment of time, and then give her the opportunity to promote herself into the more valuable off-hours of your life. Use your mini-dates to audition them, and reserve your precious free time for the best of the best.

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What is Scarcity in Dating and Attraction? Well, It Depends - GrowUpBoy

Having a REAL reason to forget to call her or not have the time for a woman rather than a phony reason actually helps you in many ways. Not to mention NOT making women the primary focus of your existence.

There are many ways of not focusing all your attention on one woman, and not all of them require you to actually DATE several women at a time. For example, take Billy-Bob.

Attention, Scarcity, and Dating Women, Make Time Problems Work For You

He should keep giving other women his attention. Billy-Bob flirts with every woman he meets. He still gets phone numbers, even if he might not have the time or interest in calling them. He keeps his eye sharp for the opportunities around him. He might get a couple women to accompany him to lunch on occasion, to hone his teasing and challenge skills.


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Water would be the single most valuable resource in the world. Scarcity is like a volume knob for value.

The less available something becomes, the more value it gains. Scarcity applies not only to products, but to people as well. In dating, you are the resource. You are a potential source of value; you can provide a woman with value through positive emotions, validation, sexual pleasure, friendship, laughter, etc. The more value you represent to a girl, the more interested she will be in your company not just sexually, but in general.

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If the value you offer a woman becomes a scarce resource, the volume knob turns up, and your value is magnified. In this case, you must focus on reciprocation and liking before creating scarcity. However, once a girl feels that you have some value to offer, you can use scarcity in your favor. Making her doubt that you are interested in her company socially or sexually will increase your value from her perspective. Simply, the positive feelings you offer a girl are worth more if she thinks she might lose access to them.

Yet, if you use the principle effectively, you are flipping the dynamic on its head. She will feel an emotional urge to get back the good emotions that your conversation was providing her. She will restart the conversation herself within a few seconds, only now, she will have a sense that you might not be as interested in her as she previously thought. If you had any sexual value in her eyes, this will increase her interest.

Two Different Types of Scarcity

The above strategies are useful because they help you emotionally understand how scarcity works in dating, but, ultimately, scarcity is created through the overall impression you make. This will take time to develop. But, if you make a habit of using techniques like those I mentioned above in all your interactions, you will start to get an emotional feel for how scarcity plays out. This intuitive understanding will dramatically shift the dynamic of your interactions with women- in your favor.

Learn how to use proven psychological principles to attract women.