Just wanted to know your thoughts? Is it weird or wrong if a 26 year old woman dates a 20 year old male? Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play. Report 1 year ago 2. Original post by AOF Just wanted to know your thoughts? Report 1 year ago 3. I don't see any problem with it.
- 26 year old male dating a 20 year old female. Yay or Nay? | IGN Boards.
- 34 year old dating 20 year old -very confused - Older relationship | Ask MetaFilter.
- How young is too young?!? (dating).
- Topic: Older guys dating younger girls | Yeshiva World News.
They're both adults and if it works for them, good for them. Report 1 year ago 4. Report 1 year ago 5. If you want the same things and are able to fight together through the adversities of life with respect for one another than it's fine. I actually know a couple that have that exact age difference and started dating at that age. At this moment they are still together, they have a child and they're working on being parents again. The point is that this isn't good and I'll bet serious money that if you stay with him there will be tears.
Never date anyone who's not wildly enthusiastic about you and welcoming of you into his life. You don't plan when relationships will expire. As for your life I totally dated all these guys twice my age when I was young. Haha, from my perspective here in the future, at their age, guess what!? But that's okay, I had fun most of the time. Never mind what we think, he thinks that this potential relationship would be bad for you and damaging to you, but he wants to string you along towards it anyway.
What does this say about him? What stands out to me is that there is nothing in your post about what you like about him. If you were 20 and you were like, "We are both really into building bikes out of steel and collecting stuffed parrots, and I ride my bike to his house every afternoon, and we're best friends and can't get enough of each other and there is tons of attraction, is the age gap a big deal?
A lot of that hinges on what you want to be doing with your time. What are you into? You should be getting up to adventures. If there is not a single thing in your post about what you LIKE about him that you want to be doing together other than staring at each other and wondering if you should have sex or a relationship then I think you can do better. You've been dating this guy for almost a year. Has there ever been a time when it seemed kind of peaceful and stable and like you were just enjoying it? Have you ever felt deliciously in love?
Because what you describe sounds like an exhausting rollercoaster. This kind of thing can make a relationship seem a lot more interesting than it is. And I know you can't put everything into an AskMe post, but I'm not getting much sense of what excites you about this guy. You have a lot in common? You have all the choice in the world; why would you pick someone who acts like this? I want to slap this guy for the way he keeps breaking up with you and playing hard to get.
I say this as someone who married a man with more than that much of an age difference, and I met him when I was younger than you. I look back on that marriage with much fondness. There were also a ton of problems, many to do with my young age and poor judgment, as Postroad mentioned. I wouldn't bother with this fellow anymore. I have a personal history with age gaps-- when I was 18 I dated a year-old, which worked out just fine for both of us as a not-very-serious-but-nice thing.
That was the biggest age gap, but there have been several others of years, and those haven't worked out any worse than my involvements with people closer to my age. Even if he doesn't have another girlfriend, he seems like a bit of a mess. If you can get out, you probably should. If you can't bring yourself to, well, bad times make good stories for later.
This guy is wasting your time. Call him up and let him down like the confused puppy he is.
26 year old male dating a 20 year old female. Yay or Nay?
When I was a youngster, I dated a few guys who were much older and, yeah, they all turned out to be sort of losers. But, I handled them all pretty well, in retrospect. The guy who was joking about "jail bait" on our third date? Sorry -- if you can't handle the age difference then what the hell am I supposed to do?
Another guy just really seemed to like showing me off to his friends but had precious little to talk about when we were together. My most serious age-gap boyfriend was only five years older but I was 19 and that was a big gap at that age. I realized that I wasn't ready to be his long-term relationship which is what he was very ready to have and so I broke it off. Later that summer, I accepted a date with a guy who I pegged to be about 25, maybe.
Anyway, you have agency here. This guy is just not going to work out and who knows what his problem is. But he's 34 and if he can't get it together at that age then I don't think you want to mess around with him. Not this fake sort of break-up you've been having, but for real. Not because this dude is older than you. Because this dude is a jerk. It is perfectly okay to say to someone, honestly and kindly, "I like you, but I really want a sexual relationship, which you are not currently interested in, so I'm afraid this isn't going to work out for me.
And just because he stopped doing that for the time being doesn't mean it was okay for him to do it, repeatedly, in the first place, or that he won't do it again. I think the issue here is that this man is attracted to you, but really wants to have sex, NOW, and is not patient enough to wait for you to feel comfortable about it, or reasonable enough to have a respectful and rational, no-pressure conversation with you about it.
I think he feels just guilty enough about having those feelings, and having already pressured you over it, that he is now engaged in a weird kabuki dance about what he actually wants instead of telling you, or openly admitting to himself, what he actually wants which is a partner who will have sex with him, now.
A younger man dating an older woman | Ask MetaFilter
It's weird to demand a specific planned length for a relationship before it even starts. I think he started doing this in order to convince you and himself, too, probably that he's really for real committed enough to be worthy of you giving up your virginity and having sex with him. It's weird to suddenly impose rules on a relationship like "we can have lunch dates but you can't come over to my house anymore.
I agree with everybody here. And the weirdest thing by far is the 'term limits' on the relationships. No, that's not usually how people approach relationships; typically, they are more open-ended in the the expectation is just that they'll continue until they don't, get progressively more intimate unlike this one and I don't mean sexually intimate , and timetables only enter in if one party is wanting to move forward faster than the other, and then they have to decide how long they are going to give the current relationship to develop.
You have many other options. The most important argument here, I think, is that no matter what's going on, this guy is not acting at all like a guy who's interested in you for you. I know it's exciting to be the pursued one and to feel like you are caught up in star-crossed, tortured romance, but actually, compared to being loved and respected by a peer, it's all kind of crap.
This guy knows better. He's trying to get out.
How young is too young?!? (dating)
You should give him his walking papers to make it easier on both of you. You should be having a great time dating people who are somewhere closer in life to where you are - wanting to get to know each other, enjoy spending time together, and making big life decisions at a pace that's appropriate and comfortable to you. Yeah, that is weird.
It reminded me of the movie Guinevere. There's this guy who dates a series of younger women for a couple of years apiece, and it's treated like he's a sort of postgraduate program they are going through. I think this is a good movie for people to watch if they find themselves dating mentor figures. It does put a positive spin on this type of relationship, presenting it as a formative experience, but it's rather eye-opening.
Try going no-contact for some set period of time perhaps three months and don't break it--set an expectation with him that, as a matter of respect toward you, he needs to honor the no-contact period. Give yourself and him! The whole "We're meeting at coffee shops but not anywhere that could lead to sex" plan is terrible, and I suspect he knows it. It will just keep the two of you in a space where the relationship is an enticing possibility, not a reality you're exploring and then choosing to continue or sever.
Neither his sexuality nor yours is a wild force that needs to be contained in public spaces lest it unleash itself--sex is something you choose to do together, and you could very easily choose to leave the coffee shop, go to his house, and have sex. Or, you could have a romantic dinner at his house and choose not to have sex. Take him at his word that he no longer wants to be in the relationship he's been trying to persuade you to commit to.
Ignore his flip-flopping about "no contact doesn't seem right, either. Block this guy's access to you online, phone, etc and RUN. He's not a nice fellow, and I'm having a very difficult time understanding how a percentage of mefites in this thread interpreted his actions as though he is nice and trustworthy. I dated with that age gap at your age.
Yes the age gap can be OK, but in your case, this guy is manipulating you. I think he maybe has a girlfriend, and either way he's playing games because you are still a virgin. He should have initiated this when he discovered you weren't up for having sex with him. At 34, he's planning on having a 4 to 5 year long relationship with you that includes sex.
Is he telling you he is not the marrying kind, but a player instead?