When we're in our mid 80's and we just round up to the nearest "old as fuck", and when we're dating someone who's nearly 10 years younger than us. Met my now husband at 25 and he was Works well, we were in similar life situations despite the age gap. It depends a lot on personal maturity. Secondly, the main thing you need to know is that she's in a different phase of life than you. That means a few things:. She might not be the same person one year from now. I'm going through this right now with my gf.
I'm not sure we want the same things from life anymore. Also, on another note. Anybody else think OP was being combative? They saw his post as being against their rules, which is completely fair, and then he responds with:. If someone's reading comprehension level is above a third grade reading level, you can plainly see that is what it is asking about Kind of feel OP is being a little dishonest with himself if he thinks they were "accusing him" of being combative.
He kind of was, wasn't he? Thanks for the heads up. Approaching 30 here and been on a few dates with a 21 year old that is showing some promise. We were together for about 10 months or so, but was a year in the making more or less. We had been friends, I had a girlfriend, she had a boyfriend, and that was that. We suddenly both were single at the same time, and since we shared so many common interests, genuinely had a really great time together, could talk for hours on end about anything and everything. Honestly, one of my healthier relationships.
Her friends and family did not approve. So they made it impossible to do anything, they didn't want to meet me, and wouldn't even give me a chance, they just tried to always get her to be with them so she couldn't be with me. They didn't care how she felt, they only cared about their perceptions. So , sadly, despite how great we were, there were challenges. We broke up for about 2 weeks, then when we got back together her parents realized we actually liked each other and they accepted me and us.
Can Women In Their 30's Dating Men In Their 20's Ever Actually Work?
So what to expect, she would put herself first, mainly because she doesn't know any better. IN her eyes she wasn't doing anything wrong by doing things without me, never involving me and taking mixed sex vacations without me. Before you say I am an idiot, I had no reason to suspect cheating, she isn't like that, Ive known her for a while..
Money wasn't really an issue, she had a good job, she could pay her way for things, but I have a great job, so rarely would I let her. Society wasn't bad, as she seemed much older than her age and i didn't look as old as I am. So in public we never got a weird look, were always fine and always greeted as a couple with no issues.
My friends, co-workers and colleagues treated her with respect and as an equal, her friends still would never even meet me.
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We had a lot of fun together, she was an amazing person, I could have been with her for ages, but the way she would defend her friends and treat me around them on the couple occasions I was involved made it obvious she had the baggage of dating me. And I know what it looked like to her friends and family, beautiful blonde hooks up with successful world traveller. No one cared that we were genuinely happy. So the point of this long babble, it can work, but just know that the world outside of you two will influence so many things that will be beyond your control, and all it takes is a few minutes of weakness to get upset about it.
I was a toddler! So in public we never got a weird look. That's something I hadn't thought about. I'm 28 and the guy I'm into is 40 and people always think I'm way younger than I am, like to the point where I'm frequently uncomfortable in certain places walking around with my toddler I get weird looks.
I'm ok with being 28 and seeing a year-old. I don't know how ok I am if random people think I'm a teenager. My last boyfriend was Dating older men is awesome and I think the feeling is mutual. I love the thought that my age is a factor in his attraction to me--in some probably fucked up way it made me feel really good to know how good he felt dating someone so much younger than him. It was also pretty hot at first being his arm candy. I'm a pretty confidant woman and take a lot of pride in my appearance and in cultivating interesting experiences and skills etc.
Downfalls- Being in such different places in your life will create some issues. I have found that when you're in the arena of 10 years, your cultural reference points will be different. This isn't a big deal, but it does mean a lot of explaining about certain things. It also can be a bit awkward introducing friends and family.
My 37 year old boyfriend definitely did a LOT of work trying to find a friend amongst the boyfriends of my friends. Not like he couldn't find common ground, but the age difference really was apparent among friends closer to my age. Ultimately the biggest issue between us was that our wants are so different. I want to be in a committed relationship, but am not looking for anything immediately serious. He either wants a FWB or a wife, no compromise. I have a question for you if you don't mind taking a few moments to answer.
At what point in a committed relationship would you consider marriage? A certain length of time, reaching a certain age, etc. I've noticed that as people age they tend to jump into things like marriage more quickly and the times spent dating shrink, while younger people tend to want to wait for marriage and ride relationships out longer before getting hitched. I'm trying to figure out if it's a maturity, generational or societal thing. I'm drafting a response to a article that's been circulating recently, lack your perspective, and am intrigued by the dichotomy you describe. Doesn't it feel scary knowing that if they were primarily attracted to your age, they might want to "upgrade" you to a younger model in a few years?
Nobody stays young forever. Relying on your youth to keep his attention is very unreliable, IMO.
I'm surprised that many women and men dating older people don't really seem to consider this. That is definitely a reality I have considered, but in my case it's a two way street. Yes, in a few years he might decide that my age is no longer sexy, but I will probably come to the same conclusion.
Relationship Advice: Is This Guy Too Young For Me?
I'm in my 20's, still spry, active, and a little irresponsible. He is closer to his 40's, and the biggest outings we ever did were baseball games and getting drunk at our local watering hole.
Total babe, but not as much fun as he probably was in his 20s or 30s. I don't want a partner who wants to go out all the time and I am very introverted. But I imagine that when I'm in my 30's and he's closer to 50, i would be ready to bite into something a little closer to my own age. He might not find me sexy, but I might find him boring. On the other side of the coin, it's not like our age gap would shrink.
And I plan on staying hot forever. I'm twenty four and my boyfriend just turned thirty two. We both never went to college and work similar jobs so we had some common ground to start with. Building on that, we are just opposite enough to fit really well together. I'm actually the more serious one about rules and such.
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He keeps me in the moment and lightens things up when I get anxious. So far so good. No one has given me any trouble about it. I suspect he might get judged a little more than me. Why do you think the male is judged?
Can Women In Their 30's Dating Men In Their 20's Ever Work? | Personal Space
I mean I look at it from a biological standpoint, it seems common for men of all ages to find younger women attractive. Yet there seems to be societal backlash against it. I just find it interesting. Because women get angry that they're no longer lusted after as much as they were in their youth? You got a young, spritely, pretty and they have to go home to their tired, older, more relaxed wives.
I think it also may be perceived as making a commentary on the male's emotional or psychological maturity, i. However absurd this argument all is, it may make him seem under-matured himself. I've had it before, but usually it gives way to other feelings once I get to know the guy.